Chapter 5
This chapter was translated by shizuumi151 and yuugs, and proofread by kuririn, yuugs, and dei-hime!
One day...
The moment I opened the classroom door that morning, the students inside stopped talking all at once and turned to look in my direction. Even when I just stood up from my seat and started walking, I could feel everyone's gazes following me.
...Now that I thought about it… The atmosphere at Hakuo Academy had been sort of weird since this morning.
We were well into the new semester. The unforgiving chill of winter was finally beginning to let up. Since the start of February, I'd grown used to rubbing my shaking hands together while walking to and from school.
After completing the most arduous class of the week― Monday first period―I frowned, thinking about the odd feeling that had been growing since that morning.
Chizuru Yukimura: "......"
Classmate A: "......"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Um... Do you have a minute?"
Classmate A: ‘!! W-What is it, Yukimura? Oh, do you wanna tell me something? Whatever it is, you can tell me!"
Chizuru Yukimura: "...No. Sorry. It's nothing, actually."
Seeing the jumpy, nervous state my classmates were in made me frown even more deeply. And it wasn't just my classmates, either. Everyone I passed by in the hallways, all the senior students...absolutely everyone had been acting downright strange since that morning.
Classmate B: "......"
I'd lock eyes with people, and they'd quickly look away.
Classmate C: "......"
The opposite happened, too. People would shoot me an earnest look whenever I said something inconsequential. Honestly, just what in the world was going on with everyone...?
And then, during the lunch break after morning classes, I just couldn't stand how everyone was staring at me anymore. I rushed out into the hallway as soon as the bell rang. When I first enrolled, I got a lot of stares as the only female student, but even so...
Chizuru Yukimura: "I feel like people are staring at me even more than they did back then..."
In the courtyard. In the corridor outdoors. I grabbed my bento and walked off, hoping to get away from all the stares. I looked for anywhere I could go where no one else would be around. The place I finally settled on was the quietest room in the school.
Chizuru Yukimura: "―Excuse me."
Keisuke Sannan: "Oh? What an unexpected guest to have."
Susumu Yamazaki: "Yukimura-kun? What's wrong? Are you feeling sick?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "No, I feel fine, thank you. Actually..."
[time skip as she explains]
Keisuke Sannan: "...I see. You feel as though you're drawing even more attention than usual."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Yes. I may just be being overly self-conscious, but I feel like there's always someone who's looking at me. Is there anything...strange about me today? Like my appearance, or..."
Maybe I had bed-head, for example. Or maybe my jacket was buttoned wrong. As I spun once in place to show them how I looked, Yamazaki-senpai quickly averted his eyes.
Susumu Yamazaki: "......"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Oh, something must be out of place then, huh? Is it my clothes? Or my face...?"
Susumu Yamazaki: "No, there's nothing wrong with your face. You look as good as you alw― um, you look like you always do!" Yamazaki-senpai hurriedly shook his head for some reason.
Sannan-sensei smiled wryly and said:
Keisuke Sannan: "I haven't seen the situation firsthand, so this may be mere conjecture, but… could it be that all the students in your vicinity look restless and agitated?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Ah, yes. Now that you put it that way, I think that's right. Someone nearly jumped out of their skin earlier when I called out to them. I wonder if I did something wrong without noticing, somehow...?"
Keisuke Sannan: "I suppose. You may be correct, in a certain sense."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Huh...?"
Keisuke Sannan: "Hehe, in short, you are at fault for being too attractive."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Whaaat...!?"
Keisuke Sannan: "I think you will come to understand what I mean soon enough. Isn't that right, Yamazaki-kun?"
Susumu Yamazaki: "...I do not understand why you're trying to drag me into this."
Sensei had called me 'attractive'... Could it be that he was teasing me...? I reflexively shot him a reproachful glare, but he showed no signs of noticing. He gave me a sweet smile and spoke again.
Keisuke Sannan: "Ah, more importantly, it seems as though you have yet to eat your lunch."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Yes. I couldn't stand to stay in the classroom any longer, so I didn't eat there."
Keisuke Sannan: "Well, then, why don't you eat here? It seems you brought along your bento."
I felt that he had deftly dodged my questions somehow, but… I decided that I'd take him up on his offer for now and gave a little nod. I ended up staying much longer than I'd intended to. By the time I left the infirmary, I had very little of my lunch break remaining.
Chizuru Yukimura: "I'm pretty sure that my first afternoon class is math with Nagakura-sensei..." Maybe it was because I had had a good meal, or because I had talked with those two, but I felt a little less anxious. "...But, for the time being, I need to find somewhere to kill a little more time."
Then, as I walked off, away from where math would take place, a huge obstacle blocked my path and my vision.
Shinpachi Nagakura: "Whoops! Where are you off to, Yukimura-kun? Don't you have math in just a bit? If you wanna skip my class, then I don't wanna hear about it!"
Chizuru Yukimura: "No, I wasn't intending to do that..."
Shinpachi Nagakura: "Hm? Well, where are you going then? Toilet?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "......" Nagakura-sensei sometimes was a little...lacking in tact. "No, that's not it. Actually..."
[time skip as she explains]
Shinpachi Nagakura: "So your classmates are acting kinda weird, huh? I see."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Do you know something about it?"
Shinpachi Nagakura: "Well, that's, you know… It's just that time of year." He folded his arms, nodding sagely to himself as he replied. "The day that men both dream of and dread… Valentine's Day!"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Oh..."
I hadn't been consciously aware of it because there were still a couple of days left before the 14th, but now that I thought about it, it was already February. Valentine's ads usually flooded the city around now. That would more or less explain all the attention I had been getting since that morning. It was actually a bigger mystery that I hadn't noticed sooner...
Shinpachi Nagakura: "You're the only one in the whole school who can do something for Valentine's Day, Yukimura-kun. Who does the school idol's heart belong to? Anyone would be interested in finding that out."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Please stop. This is so embarrassing… Incidentally, how about you, Nagakura-sensei? You sound like you're excited for Valentine's Day."
Shinpachi Nagakura: "Of course. This year, I'm definitely going to get chocolate from some beautiful ladies for once!"
Chizuru Yukimura: "'For once,' huh..." I was sort of wondering if he'd ever gotten any before, but I decided not to ask for the moment.
Shinpachi Nagakura: "Well, I think that there are tons of guys who are hoping to get chocolate from you, but… If you feel obligated to go around and give some to every one of 'em...no matter how much you have, it'll never be enough. It'll at least be peaceful around here until the 14th, so just forget about it for now! C'mon, let's head to class!"
After he had explained what was going on, Nagakura-sensei started walking, leading the way to the classroom.
Would it be easier for me to go back in if he was there with me...? I decided to follow after him.
Chizuru Yukimura: "Valentine's Day, hmm..."
Now that he’d mentioned it, I realized I really did need to start thinking about it. The holiday was inching closer and closer.
‘What should I make this year...?’
My afternoon classes felt like they'd lasted longer than usual, but they were finally over. A feeling of freedom came over me as the final bell rang. School had finished for today. The moment homeroom ended, I left the classroom.
Thanks to the chats I had during lunch break, I knew the reason why everyone was acting like that, but that didn't change how uncomfortable it made me. On the contrary, now that I knew what everyone was expecting from me, I felt more and more like I couldn't stand to stay there a second longer.
Chizuru Yukimura: "Phew..."
As the sun began to set, the shadow of all those chocolatey expectations caused my face to fall. Soon enough, the day that gave women the courage to confess their love would roll around. A day where girls gave both chocolate and their hearts to the object of their desires, hoping to start something.
Chizuru Yukimura: "Who in the world should I give―" I was shaken from my thoughts by some sort of commotion going on right in front of me. "What's with this crowd...?"
There was a throng of people, all crowded around some sort of notice board affixed to the hallway wall. I spotted some people I recognized amidst the crowd and called out to them.
Chizuru Yukimura: "Amagiri-senpai, Shiranui-senpai!"
Kyuuju Amagiri: "Oh, it's Yukimura-kun. Are you on your way home?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "I was, but… What's going on over here?"
Kyou Shiranui: "Don'tcha think it'd be faster just to see it? Hey, you―move it or lose it!"
I stepped into the space Shiranui-senpai had made for me and began to read the bulletin aloud.
Chizuru Yukimura: "'Announcement― Beginning tomorrow, students will undergo random personal effects inspections for a week. Entertainment and gaming systems, as well as unnecessary food and drink, will be confiscated’...!?"
Kyuuju Amagiri: "Starting tomorrow and lasting for one week. In other words, until Valentine's day. The perfect plan to eliminate any potential chocolate-giving."
Kyou Shiranui: "And the only person nasty enough to think this up… Well, you can take a guess, yeah?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Don't tell me...it's Kazama-senpai?"
Kyou Shiranui: "Naw, it ain't our boss. He's aiming for the opposite, actually."
Kyuuju Amagiri: "Yes. Contrary to this announcement, Kazama-sama is impatiently awaiting his chocolates."
Chizuru Yukimura: "So, if it's not him, then it's..."
???: "It hurts to be called ‘nasty,’ you know?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Kaoru...!"
Pushing his way through the crowd, Kaoru strode swiftly up to where we were standing.
Chizuru Yukimura: "Kaoru, what does this mean? Is this notice from the disciplinary committee?"
Kaoru Nagumo "Of course. It's our job to correct any disruptions to order within the school."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Why are you doing such a thing...?"
Kaoru Nagumo: "Why? Isn't it obvious? If we take no preventative measures, the riffraff won't have a shred of shame coming to pester you for obligation chocolates. But if it's banned from the school grounds entirely, everyone will have to give up, right? You should be grateful to have such a kind older brother."
Chizuru Yukimura: "But, if things are like this now, if I happen to bring romantic chocolates, won't they end up being confiscated, too...?"
Kaoru Nagumo: “! ...R-...Romantic chocolate, you say? Hmph, well, say whatever you like. If I recall… You don't have anyone you want confess to in the first place, right?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Well..."
Kaoru Nagumo: "Or...don't tell me you intend to confess to someone like Toudou or Okita, or even Saitou...!"
Chizuru Yukimura: "I-I didn't say anything like that...!"
Kaoru continued to rattle off a rapid-fire stream of questions while completely ignoring my objections. How should I put this...? I had had no idea he was even capable of looking as frustrated as he did now.
Kaoru Nagumo: "Anyway, you're still too young! You absolutely can't bring any chocolate! Got it? You absolutely cannot!" Kaoru went to the trouble of reminding me twice before he briskly marched away. I was left dumbfounded in his wake and turned around to face Amagiri-senpai and Shiranui-senpai.
Chizuru Yukimura: "...Amagiri-senpai, Shiranui-senpai. I'm sorry you had to see such a shameful display."
Kyou Shiranui: "I mean, I don't mind, but… What even was that?"
Kyuuju Amagiri: "It seems that the inner workings of an older brother's mind are just as mysterious as those of a woman's..."
After that, I parted ways with Amagiri-senpai and Shiranui-senpai and passed through the front gate on my way home. Even if I set aside the random inspections for now, I couldn't escape the fact that Valentine's Day was fast approaching.
Chizuru Yukimura: "I really don't have a choice. I need to start thinking about what chocolates to make… And the person I want to give chocolates to, huh?" My mumbled words turned to white fog as they left my mouth, floating up out of anyone’s reach in the pink sky.
Just one week left until Valentine's Day.
I wondered whether anyone would accept these sweet, aching feelings in my heart...
Despite my worrying, time relentlessly marched ever onwards. With the first half of February coming to a close, Valentine's Day was also fast approaching.
I went to school via my usual route. Today, the number of people I saw standing in front of the school entrance had me blinking.
Chizuru Yukimura: "Another inspection?"
The personal effects inspections conducted by the disciplinary committee were a sight I'd become intimately familiar with over the last few days. Just like Kaoru had wanted―and thanks to what he did― I didn't need to worry about being in the limelight too much. But...
Chizuru Yukimura: "I don't think it's really necessary for them to do this every day, though..." I opened up my bag with a deep sigh, and prepared for the inspection. But the one standing in front of all the students at the school gate wasn't who I expected it to be.
Isami Kondou: "Morning, morning! ...Ohh, Yukimura-kun! Morning!"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Good morning, Kondou-sensei. Are you out greeting everyone this morning? It must be quite hard with it being this cold out."
Isami Kondou: "No, no, I can handle this much... Well, I wish I could say that, but it is fairly chilly today."
Chizuru Yukimura: "The start of February is the coldest time of the year, really."
Isami Kondou: "Indeed. You think it'll gradually get warmer in the first half, and that you can endure it for a little longer. ...Oh, which reminds me. Valentine's Day is coming up in this half of the month. Do you have anyone you've made chocolates for?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "That’s, well..."
If there were someone I'd make chocolates for… If there were someone I wanted to express my feelings for, that would be…
―Really, there was only one person it could be. He was the strictest person I knew. At the same time, he was also the kindest person I knew. He looked out for me, and was always there to guide me throughout my first year. It had to be him. But I was afraid of what others might think if I said his name out loud…
I looked for an out, for something else to say.
Chizuru Yukimura: "In terms of who I had in mind, I suppose… The truth is, I'd like to give chocolates to all the people who have helped me out this year, including you, Kondou-sensei."
Isami Kondou: "What's this? You'd even give me some? You do have a strong sense of duty, don’t you? It's lovely to see. But, be that as it may... If you plan to give chocolates to everyone under that description, you'll end up bringing a fair amount of them, won't you?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Yes. Also, since the personal effects inspections are being conducted this time, I doubt I'd be able to really bring any in the first place."
Isami Kondou: "Mm, there is that as well… That's vexing, but as the academy's principal, I can't come out and say that I'd be looking forward to them." Kondou-sensei's shoulders drooped, but then he nodded hard and pulled himself together. "But Valentine's Day, huh… I got plenty of chocolates myself, back in the day."
Chizuru Yukimura: "You must have had a lot of fans."
Isami Kondou: "It's a little embarrassing when you put it like that, but many of them were platonic, friendship chocolates. Many of the romantic chocolates I had given to me weren't really for me, but for Toshi."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Huh...!?"
Isami Kondou: "...But Toshi never accepted chocolates from anyone. Even when he got them, the man himself would tell me how much of a pain it was to return the favor… He's always been a serious one, so obviously he wouldn't be able to accept a person's feelings if he couldn't respond in kind to them."
Chizuru Yukimura: "......"
Isami Kondou: "Oh dear, now, this won't do. Just look at the time. Sorry to have kept you."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Oh, no, I'm happy to have been able to chat with you this morning." I gave him a light nod, and started hurrying to class.
So Hijikata-sensei was known for not accepting chocolates from anyone. Although hearing that relieved me, at the same time, my chest felt painfully tight at the thought, too…
Toshizou Hijikata: "Remember, a 'sun' was an ancient unit of measurement. Nowadays, it would be equivalent to 30.3 millimeters. The expression of 'a person no more than three sun high' in the Tale of the Bamboo Cutter, in other words, means that they were around nine centimeters tall."
I listened to the familiar sounds of chalk tapping the blackboard alongside Hijikata-sensei's voice. I could usually follow his lectures easily, but today everything just went in through one ear and out the other entirely. The classical literature class had gone on for 30 minutes. I'd been mechanically taking notes, but I couldn't concentrate on the class at all.
Toshizou Hijikata: "From that, look at the word underlined on printout A. Here, 'beauteous' means 'pretty' or 'sweet.'"
Chizuru Yukimura: "......"
I ended up watching Hijikata-sensei's profile in a daze as he wrote with his chalk in hand. He had such well-proportioned features that he could probably be a model. Like Kondou-sensei said, there must've been lots of people who wanted to give him chocolates. I was sure of it… And I couldn't help but think that there were some real beauties among those people, compared to me.
Toshizou Hijikata: "Don't think of meanings that resemble this one. If you write 'beautiful' on the test, it'll definitely be the wrong answer."
Despite that, he didn't accept chocolates from anyone… Would he accept my chocolates if I made some for him, maybe?
Chizuru Yukimura: "Haah..."
Toshizou Hijikata: "......"
Before I even realized it, class was already over. I thought I'd hurry and write down what was on the blackboard before everything on it was erased, until someone clapped a hand on my shoulder and spoke.
Toshizou Hijikata: "Yukimura."
Chizuru Yukimura: "...! H-Hijikata-sensei, do you need me for something?"
Toshizou Hijikata: "I wanna talk to you. Come with me for a bit?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Huh...?" My feet plodded after him as he led me somewhere. Before long, we'd set foot onto the rooftop, where the winter wind chilled my arms.
Toshizou Hijikata: "...What was up with you today?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Huh?"
Toshizou Hijikata: "Don't play dumb. You were distracted throughout the whole class. Just what were you thinking about?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "I-I, um, well..." I had been thinking about him, but there was no way I could tell him that.
Hijikata-sensei scratched the back of his head, looking exasperated at my sudden silence.
Toshizou Hijikata: "Well, even a student as serious as you can have the odd off-day, too… It can't be that you've gotten swept up by all the Valentine's Day stuff coming up, right?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "N-No, not at all...!"
Toshizou Hijikata: "That's good, then, but still… Whatever you do, you'll be guaranteed to attract attention to yourself within the walls of this academy. That's pretty much applied since April, but the kind of attention you'll be getting this time is different. No doubt it’ll be enough to make you uncomfortable."
Chizuru Yukimura: "...I know. I feel like I’m attracting a lot more attention than usual this time around."
Toshizou Hijikata: "But this attention you'll be getting should quickly die down once Valentine's has passed. Things'll get worse if you have someone specific you wanna give chocolates to... but you should be able to breeze through this, otherwise."
His indifferent tone, and the meaning that hid behind it, made my breath stop for a moment. Then, to make sure, I squeezed out what I’d been wanting to ask in a squeak.
Chizuru Yukimura: "So, 'Don't give any to anyone'… Is what you’re saying...?"
Toshizou Hijikata: "...Yeah. The cultural festival. Even Christmas. You know what happens at school events. I try to treat you equally to others where I can, but you're like an idol around here. Whatever you do, the impact is always bigger than it has a right to be. With that in mind...think carefully about where you stand."
The last thing he said sounded almost like it was meant for himself, too. If I brought any chocolates, it would probably kick up a fuss. As a teacher, and as an advisor to the disciplinary committee, Hijikata-sensei's approach was completely sound. But...
Chizuru Yukimura: "......"
Toshizou Hijikata: "Your silence tells me you've got someone you wanna give chocolates to, huh?"
I slowly opened my eyes to look at him, and said…
[I don't really have anyone in mind]
[There is someone I have in mind]
I wanted to give some to Hijikata-sensei… I wondered how happy I would be if I could just say that. But, just as those words were about to leap off the tip of my tongue, I recalled what he'd just said:
Toshizou Hijikata: "Things'll get worse if you have someone specific you wanna give chocolates to…
but you should be able to breeze through this, otherwise."
When he said 'someone specific,' was it that he didn't know who it could be...? Or...was he implying that he did know...?
Chizuru Yukimura: "......" In the end, the smile I forced was a little sad, and I finally brought myself to say, "...No, I don't really have anyone in mind, right now."
Toshizou Hijikata: "I see... That's good. I was worried for nothing, then."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Besides, they would just get taken away in the personal effects inspection if I brought any, anyway," I cracked a smile while I joked, and Hijikata-sensei gave me a dry one back.
Valentine's Day was only coming in a matter of days. I hadn't even realized how soon it would be. Yet even if I made chocolates, I wouldn't be able to bring them to school without them getting confiscated. ...Besides, I didn't even know for sure he would accept them. In which case, I...
I wanted just a little more time.
But time still marched on regardless, and the days couldn’t very well get longer just because I wanted them to…
Before I even knew it, the calendar already read mid-February.
I spent my Saturday afternoon preparing for Valentine's Day, which was fast approaching…
I visited the Hakuo Academy cafeteria with Osen-chan and Kosuzu-chan over the weekend.
Sen Suzuka: "This is Hakuo Academy's cafeteria? I saw a little bit of it during the cultural festival, but it really is spacious."
Kosuzu Suzuka: "Ours is a little bit smaller. Lots of people bring bento lunches anyway."
Usually, I was the only girl here, so it felt really strange seeing other girls in school like this. The two of them looked at the unfamiliar menu and grinned.
Sen Suzuka: "Look, Kosuzu! Doesn't this pudding sound delicious?"
Kosuzu Suzuka: "Osen-san, we're not here to eat or anything..."
Well, Kosuzu-chan was right. We didn't come here today to eat...
Genzaburou Inoue: "I hope you three weren't waiting long. Everything's ready now."
Chizuru Yukimura: "That must have been a lot of work, Inoue-san. Thank you so much."
Kosuzu Suzuka: "But is it really alright? For people who aren't students here to borrow your kitchen like this?"
Genzaburou Inoue: "You've already gotten permission, haven't you? Besides, you're from Shimabara Girls' High School. There's no need to be shy."
Sen Suzuka: "Well, we'll take you up on your offer, then… So? How about we get started? Time to make chocolates!"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Yeah!"
Genzaburou Inoue: "Now, I don't want to get in the way of you girls, so I'll stay in the back and leave you to it. You're free to use whatever equipment you need in the kitchen. Just be careful with the stove."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Sure thing! Thank you so much!" After thanking him, we first lined up all the ingredients we had brought in a row.
Chizuru Yukimura: "...Fresh cream. Unsalted butter. Cocoa powder..."
Kosuzu Suzuka: "Wheat flour, eggs, baking powder..."
Sen Suzuka: "Chocolate to use, more chocolate to use. Oh, and some chocolate to use."
......
Chizuru Yukimura: "...Um, Osen-chan? Are you making a life-sized chocolate statue?"
Sen Suzuka: "Huh? What, Chizuru-chan, would you be the model for it?"
Kosuzu Suzuka: "It's surreal to imagine that being eaten..."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Absolutely not!"
Sen Suzuka: "Oh, boo... Well, we're not even making one big chocolate in the first place anyway. We'll be making lots of smaller ones."
Kosuzu Suzuka: "Osen-san has a large circle of friends. She also needs to prepare some for her relatives."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Ohh, I see..."
Sen Suzuka: "It must be nice for you two. You look like you're making chocolates to give to your special someone."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Huh!?"
Sen Suzuka: "Well, I don't know if you have anyone like that to give chocolates to, Chizuru-chan… But lately, Kosuzu's gotten close with that Ibuki-kun guy we met at the pool, see."
Chizuru Yukimura: "S-Since when...!?"
Kosuzu Suzuka: "I-It's not really like that… These chocolates are just friendly ones..." With her ingredients cradled in hand, Kosuzu-chan's expression softened tenderly, her muttered protests weak. I felt a bit jealous seeing that, but I also found myself making a similarly fond face.
Sen Suzuka: "Now, then, how about we make those chocolates?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Yeah! Let's do this!"
I wondered if I'd ever make such a tender face as I put my heart into what I made. But either way, I had to do my best making them...!
Before anything else, our first step was to warm things up. The chocolate we heated inside the bowl slowly started to melt.
Chizuru Yukimura: "Now, next is..."
With the chocolate's sweet-smelling fragrance, it was only natural that I was reminded of someone.
(CG get!°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°)
―Would Hijikata-sensei accept these chocolates? He told me to think about where I stood. His words the other day were a warning. Kondou-sensei had also said that Hijikata-sensei didn't accept chocolates in the past, either. But...
Chizuru Yukimura: "......I'll worry about that later." I decided to make something as the meringue was foaming. I brought up my recipe.
Right. I could make sachertorte. The dark chocolate cake had a slight bitterness hidden beneath its sweet flavor...
While I thought about that, at the end of the day… Even with the tasty chocolates prepared, I wasn't even sure that I could bring them to school in the first place...
Chizuru Yukimura: "Hmmm..." Maybe I could trick the Disciplinary Committee one way or the other during the inspections...
Osen-chan and Kosuzu-chan cocked their heads a little at me. Maybe because they realized that I'd stopped working at some point.
Sen Suzuka: "What's wrong, Chizuru-chan?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Nothing, I just don't know if I can bring these to school, even though I've made them."
Kosuzu Suzuka: "...What do you mean?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "The truth is..."
[Transition while she explains]
Sen Suzuka: "That's what the inspections are for...? What the heck!? That's so mean of them!"
Kosuzu Suzuka: "The fact they're doing it now means they're totally targeting Valentine's Day."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Yeah..."
Hearing the situation, the two were infuriated. They stopped making their chocolates and looked ready to run over and give the Disciplinary Committee a beating right this second. I shook my head in a hurry at them.
Chizuru Yukimura: "C-Calm down, you two. It's already been decided anyway..."
Sen Suzuka: "But, isn't that just totally tyrannical!? Maybe if I go and give them a complaint or two..."
Kosuzu Suzuka: "Osen-san. You'd be sure to cause havoc if you did that, so try and bear with it. ...Although, even though it's definitely unfair, I feel like there is some point to it. Speaking practically, you have fewer boys to worry about wanting chocolates from you thanks to that notice."
Chizuru Yukimura: "You...have a point, but..."
Sen Suzuka: "Mm..."
Kosuzu Suzuka: "You can't really do much seeing as it's already been decided, and if there's someone you want to give chocolates to, you could just do it on your way home, right?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Yeah..." Honestly, Kosuzu-chan might've been right. Even if I wanted to give chocolates to someone, there wasn't any reason I had to bring them to school...
Sen Suzuka: "...I think that’d be a waste. I mean, Valentine's Day alone is a whole page in this chapter of our lives as high schoolers, right? There's meaning in giving chocolates to the person who you want at school, plus you'll make memories that way, too."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Y-Yeah... I guess that’s true too..."
Sen Suzuka: "If there's someone you wanna give them to no matter what, then this is the one chance you get this year! You can't give in to the rules!!"
Kosuzu Suzuka: "But I think it'd be really sad if you got your chocolates confiscated as a result."
Sen Suzuka: "...Well, whatever you end up doing, it’s all up to you, Chizuru-chan."
What was the right thing to do? I thought about that in the back of my mind as I finished preparing my chocolate dessert.
The chill of winter had settled in again today, too. Plum blossoms had started blooming sooner than I'd expected though: a sign of spring despite the cold of February 14th.
It was Valentine's Day, a day of excitement for people all over the world. And yet, I found myself in a daze all morning during my walk to school.
Chizuru Yukimura: "...Is this really alright...?"
Osen-chan had told me when we made our chocolates together yesterday:
Sen Suzuka: "There's meaning in giving them to the person who you want to at school,
plus you'll make memories that way, too."
Chizuru Yukimura: "...I think that’s a lovely way to think about it." If I could give him Valentine's chocolates at school… It would definitely make for a wonderful memory. I might even be able to pluck up the courage to tell him how I felt. "...But then again… for me to go so far as to break the rules by bringing chocolates in..."
Hijikata-sensei was―the person I liked was―someone who lived on the straight and narrow to the very end. He was said to be overly strict on students at times, and had even received backlash for it in the past. He hardened his heart and judged students relentlessly so they could thrive in the future.
Chizuru Yukimura: "But if I took the initiative to break the rules despite that… I'm positive that would make him mad..." Plus, with the way he guided me as a teacher that past year, I didn't think I'd be able to face him again if I did that. That was why...
Chizuru Yukimura: "......"
I glanced towards my bag that I was carrying under my arm. There weren't any chocolates in this bag.
I didn't bring any. I couldn't bring any.
I had left my feelings on my desk at home.
I was so wrapped up in my worries that it seemed the scenery around me hadn’t registered. When I finally looked up, the school gates were already right in front of me. S I wondered how I made it here already, someone called my name, and I looked to see who it was.
Hajime Saitou: "Yukimura. Morning."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Oh... Saitou-senpai. Good morning."
Hajime Saitou: "You look pale. Are you alright? I can accompany you to the infirmary if you feel unwell."
Chizuru Yukimura: "...I'm fine. Sorry to make you worry."
Hajime Saitou: "Well, that's fine in that case, but..."
Chizuru Yukimura: "By the way, you're doing the personal effects inspection, right? Here are my things."
I submitted my bag for inspection, and, for a moment, a flicker of hesitation showed on Saitou-senpai's face.
Hajime Saitou: "......"
Chizuru Yukimura: "Senpai?"
Hajime Saitou: "I have my own thoughts on the inspections this time around, but… No, sorry. Even if I said it, it wouldn't make much of a difference. Rules are rules. Let me take another look."
Saitou-senpai shook his head as if to scatter unnecessary feelings before he took my bag in hand.
Hajime Saitou: "...Alright, you may go in. It seems you're following the rules to the letter. It really helps us out, that you're such a fine student."
Chizuru Yukimura: "...Thank you...very much."
For some reason, Saitou-senpai complimenting me as a fine student who upheld the rules only hurt, today. I dipped my head in a light bow to him, and left the gates, saying little else. These personal effects inspections were originally also a countermeasure for Valentine's Day… Even after my first inspection, I got in a bind where I'd get stopped and checked for chocolates I didn't have over and over again. By the time I'd entered the school building, I wasn't even surprised that the first bell had rang.
Chizuru Yukimura: "Phew… Why does everyone keep searching me even after I keep telling them I don't have any?"
Even though I'd gone through such mixed feelings leaving my chocolates at home to follow the rules. I felt half-exhausted and half-miserable as I hurried my way to class… Until, once again, a disciplinary committee member briskly walked over and stopped me.
Kaoru Nagumo: "Chizuru. Morning. You're looking pretty down in the dumps."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Kaoru..."
Kaoru Nagumo: "I shouldn't even have to ask a model student such as yourself... But, surely, you haven't brought any chocolates to school, have you?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "......"
I was so fed up and tired of all this. I opened up my bag without a word and showed him. But Kaoru gave it only a glance before he looked at me with suspicion.
Kaoru Nagumo: "It doesn't look like you've brought any at a glance, but you won't be deceiving these eyes. After all, you could be hiding them somewhere, no?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "...I'm not. I've been checked a million times by others as well."
Kaoru Nagumo: "I don't believe that. You've been weirdly close with Hijikata lately. Wouldn't you want to give him chocolates, then?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "......"
I wanted to tell Kaoru if I could. That, no matter how I felt, I wouldn't bring any chocolates with me. I gritted my teeth in a clench of my jaw, and took back my bag from Kaoru a little forcefully.
Chizuru Yukimura: "...I need to go now."
Kaoru Nagumo: "Hold it right there! I haven't finished the inspection yet!"
Unsurprisingly, I'd gotten annoyed. I ignored Kaoru and walked off. If I said any more with the way things were going, I was seriously going to lose my temper. I turned and left without stopping and tried to shake off Kaoru...!
[Minigame Victory]
If I eased up on my pace even a little bit, Kaoru was right behind me. And I was sure that if he caught up, he'd say some more snide remarks about chocolates that I didn't bring. That was why I started looking the other way when people called out to me one after the other, despite it being rude… I tried my hardest to get to class while praying that Kaoru would give up. But then...
Male Student A: "What's all this? Why's there a disciplinary committee member after you?"
Male Student B: "I hear that you brought in chocolates, Yukimura!"
Chizuru Yukimura: "H-How come there are so many people here...?!"
At some point, a wall of people had lined up around me and started making a huge racket. This was kind of absurd. I stopped and turned around to Kaoru while thinking that.
Chizuru Yukimura: "...Kaoru."
Kaoru Nagumo: "S-So you've finally stopped, huh...? Looks like you've caught onto your position here. Now, be good, and..."
Chizuru Yukimura: "You carried out the personal effects inspections to uphold order within the school, right?"
Kaoru Nagumo: "Always forgetting the full picture, as usual. Haven't I said that since the start? Why're you asking that this late in the―"
Chizuru Yukimura: "In that case, I'd say you've been disturbing the order for a while now because of them."
Kaoru Nagumo: "Ngh...!" Kaoru looked around, flustered and lost for words. A bunch of students had gathered, shuffling around where he looked behind him.
Male Student A: "Yukimura brought chocolates?!"
Male Student B: "I heard that if you're able to catch her, you'll get chocolates, though?"
Kaoru Nagumo: "No one said anything like that! Get back already, you letches!" Kaoru threatened the crowd with handing out strikes in a desperate bid to drive them away, but it seemed to have no effect whatsoever. The uncontrollable situation had me at my wits’ end. I steeled myself and stepped out in front of everyone.
Chizuru Yukimura: "―I'm sorry, everyone. I won't be able to give you any chocolates."
Kaoru Nagumo: "Chizuru...?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "So many people have helped me since I entered this school. My teachers, my seniors, my classmates… If the rules didn't say I couldn't bring any, I would've given chocolates to nearly everyone."
In truth, that wasn't really a lie either. The people here―everyone who attended Hakuo Academy like me, my wonderful classmates and seniors… They were all truly important people to me, too. However...
Chizuru Yukimura: "However, if you're hoping for chocolates made with more special feelings to them, then I can't help you with that. Even though I haven't brought any chocolates with me today… If I could, then there'd be only one person who I have such special feelings for. It's not something I can give out to anyone so freely."
Kaoru Nagumo: "......Chizuru. Let me ask you one thing. Is this person you're talking about...Hijikata?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "...Well..."
Toshizou Hijikata: "―Hey, you lot! What's with this huge fuss you're kicking up over here?!"
Sanosuke Harada: "Homeroom's starting already, you know? Let's all hurry along to class now, c'mon."
Chizuru Yukimura: "H-Hijikata-sensei...! And Harada-sensei, too..."
The two teachers scowled as they looked over the crowd. When Hijikata-sensei’s eyes found me standing stock-still in a stupor, his expression grew stern.
Toshizou Hijikata: "At any rate...you seem to be at the heart of this mess here. Harada, let me handle the clean-up here. You come with me for a moment, Yukimura."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Pardon my intrusion..."
He had brought me to the deserted staff room, which was as quiet as death in the morning.
Hijikata-sensei and I were the only ones there. There weren't many teachers in Hakuo Academy to begin with… I figured the others were probably away holding Homeroom for their respective classes.
Chizuru Yukimura: "I'm sorry, Hijikata-sensei, for causing such a tumult in the morning..."
Toshizou Hijikata: "Yeah, it was a shocker. To think, smack-bang in the middle of all those students, you were delivering a speech like that. God, I greenlit those inspections so that stuff like this wouldn't happen in the first place... That went just swell."
Chizuru Yukimura: "I'm sorry..."
Toshizou Hijikata: "Hey, I'm not really blaming you here. It's not your fault. I know that much." Hijikata-sensei gave me a dry smile, before he smiled more genuinely at me. The way his expression was so gentle, and the way and his words of acknowledgement were so kind...
―It was that smile of his that I loved.
Toshizou Hijikata: "It’s not just for show that I’ve been keeping an eye on you since you came to this school. I know very well you're not one to break the rules and purposefully cause pandemonium like that. I also know you try your hardest every day to make friends in this all-male zoo here, too." Still smiling, he added softly, "...I guess I can tell you now: as my student, you make me proud."
Chizuru Yukimura: "Hijikata-sensei..."
His warm hand plonked firmly down atop my head.
That’s right.
This whole year, I worked hard non-stop this entire time because I wanted him to recognize me, the way he was doing now. That was why him complimenting me made me so happy, and made my heart soar.
...I really did love this man. I found my heart near to bursting with that feeling.
Chizuru Yukimura: "......"
I didn't have any chocolates with my feelings in them. But if I didn't say something here and now, I was sure that I wouldn't have a second chance to be alone again like we were now. That was why, I…
Chizuru Yukimura: "Hijikata-sensei. There's something I'd like you to hear. I... I― I have feelings for―"
Toshizou Hijikata: "...Hold it."
I was poised to pour my heart out, my feelings flooding out through my words. But Hijikata-sensei turned his back on me. Like he wouldn't accept what I was saying.
(CG get!°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°)
Toshizou Hijikata: "Don't say any more."
Chizuru Yukimura: "What...?"
Toshizou Hijikata: "I can already guess what more you want to say. ...So, don't."
Chizuru Yukimura: "B-But, Hijikata-sensei, I...!"
Toshizou Hijikata: "I'm a teacher. And with my being your teacher, you should know there are some things you, being my student, shouldn’t say to me… You're a clever girl. You should know how foolish it would be if you said any more after that." His back still turned to me, Hijikata-sensei quietly admonished me. His tone almost sounded like we were in a regular class and he was trying to help a student grasp some study topic.
But I shook my head imperceptibly.
Chizuru Yukimura: "...I don't understand."
Toshizou Hijikata: "Yukimura..."
Chizuru Yukimura:: "I don't understand! I wanted to tell you the feelings I've come to be sure of from how you've nurtured me over this past year. I would be happy if you accepted them, but I was also prepared to accept it if you couldn't. So why won't you listen to me? Why won't you let me give you my confession...?"
Toshizou Hijikata: ".........I wonder how satisfied you'd be if it ended with me denying your feelings." For a short while, Hijikata-sensei stayed silent and didn't answer me. I was sure it was because if he opened his mouth, even he didn’t know what words would come out.
Toshizou Hijikata: "...Please. I can't give you an answer, with the way things are now."
Watching his back, and thinking about how he wouldn't turn around to look at me, I gnawed my lip thoughtfully.
―Hijikata-sensei was someone who lived on the straight and narrow to the very end. Even though he was judged at times for how strict he was, he thought about this school more than anyone else, and endeavored to set an example for all students. What I fell for, what I came to love, were those sides to him.
If I spoke out of selfishness now...
If I declared my feelings for him...
If I crossed the line between student and teacher, Hijikata-sensei might not answer me.
But that meant...
Hijikata-sensei, the one I loved, had to turn me down. That was why I held in my tears then, and forced myself to show him a smile.
Chizuru Yukimura: "...I don't have anything for you right now either."
Toshizou Hijikata: "What...?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "No words that would sway your heart. No chocolates filled with feelings. I don't have anything to give right now. But, someday… If I'm able to hold feelings that I can get across to you, maybe… Would you accept them then, when that day comes...?"
Toshizou Hijikata: "......"
Toshizou Hijikata: "Yeah... If I rejected you then, I'd just be a downright jerk. But that's also if you're still able to keep those feelings. We're going to be seeing each other every day over these next two years in this academy. Your feelings might also change within that time, you know?"
Chizuru Yukimura: "That will definitely never happen."
He smiled as if he were joking, but I shook my head at him. That's right. My feelings would never change. ...The way I felt for him now, the adoration I felt towards him, were too strong. Seeing his strong back, that was as far as my admiration went.. But it had to go beyond that. I didn't know how long it would take, but I would chase after Hijikata-sensei's forward-facing figure, and keep chasing it…
I would chase it until the day, someday, when I could stand beside him.